


without you, where would i be

by northernstars



Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: Cuddling, Fluff, Gen, katherine howard deserved better, soft queens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:27:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23397736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/northernstars/pseuds/northernstars
Summary: She doesn’t know how long she’s asleep before she’s woken up by Anne.“Wakey wakey, Kitty-kat. I know you’re tired but I’ve got a surprise for you, and I promise you it’s worth it.” Katherine mumbles something unintelligible and tries to push the woman away, but Anne just laughs.“Come on, I’ll help you up the stairs.”Katherine is tired and the queens give her some much needed cuddle time and love.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 101





	without you, where would i be

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the six gift exchange, a-over-caffienated-night-owl, I hope you enjoy it and I did your prompt justice!
> 
> Huge thank you to Sam and Lexi for beta reading and helping me out with this fic!

Some nights, Katherine dreams about her funeral. Or more accurately, the lack thereof. She dreams of bones lying bare in a cold, unmarked grave. Of her soul, restless even in this new life.

The nightmare comes around once every month or so, and when it does, it plagues her for days afterwards. It rattles around in her head and lingers, making her unable to sleep or concentrate, and she hates it.

She doesn’t talk about it or seek out any of the other queens for some much needed comfort. Instead, she sits alone in her dark room biting her nails and trying her best to stave off a panic attack.

Tonight is one of those nights, and Katherine flinches as she glances at her alarm clock. 3:53am. Even Cathy would most likely be asleep by now. And since tomorrow is a two show day, she feels too guilty to wake anyone else up. She has handled this alone just fine before, and this time will be no different.

So she sits and waits until it’s a decent hour to go downstairs, and if the bags under her eyes look a bit darker than normal, she prays no one will notice.

As she descends the stairs she can already hear quiet sounds in the kitchen, a sure sign that she’s not the first one to go down for breakfast. Probably either Jane or Catherine getting up early to take the most out of the day.

“Good morning, love.”

Jane then.

“Morning.” It’s barely more than a whisper, but she’s too tired to care.

“Did you sleep well?” Jane asks her that every morning without fail and Katherine gives a vague grumble that could be interpreted either way and sits down at the table. A moment later Jane puts her mug in front of her, already filled with steaming tea and a spoonful of honey. Her favourite.

Jane always seems to know what she needs before she herself does. She might be tired beyond belief, but she still sends Jane a smile and a soft thank you.

Jane ruffles her hair and places a soft kiss on the top of her head before moving away and continuing with breakfast preparations. Katherine takes a sip of her tea and listens to Jane humming a song under her breath while toasting a slice of bread. Katherine relaxes her shoulders and her heartbeat slows down.

No matter how many times they spend their mornings like this, Katherine still feels warm when Jane treats her like that. Like family. She wants nothing more than to crawl into Jane’s lap and hide from the world for a few hours, no matter how childish that might be.

Jane is warm, and Katherine still can’t shake the slight chill in her bones from the nightmare and consequently sleepless night.

Slowly the other queens trickle in and the noise in the kitchen increases. Kat doesn’t mind- if they’re all busy with each other, they might not notice how her eyes are drooping or the way she keeps zoning out before shaking herself awake again.

Three nights with little to no sleep seems to be about as much as she can take and she desperately wants to curl back into her bed. Now that everyone is awake and the house is filled with background noise she thinks it’ll make for a much easier time to sleep. As is evident by her almost nodding off in her chair at the breakfast table.

Like usual, it’s Jane who first notices something is wrong.

“Kat, love, are you alright? You haven’t touched your food.”

The gentle question brings her out of her reverie. “Hm? Oh yeah, just tired is all.” She sends Jane a smile, doing her best to make it seem genuine. It works - Jane backs off with a smile in return, but worry is still evident in her eyes and Katherine hides her grimace.

She makes an effort to eat something, shoving spoonfuls of cereal into her mouth without really tasting anything while fighting to keep her eyes open. She sneaks a cup of coffee when everyone is distracted, hoping the caffeine will keep her awake enough to function and get through the day.

Their first show goes off without a hitch. The others seem to have taken notice that she’s feeling a bit off today, and put in extra effort to make sure she never misses a cue. It makes her feel a bit guilty, seeing the others working harder to cover up for her mistakes.

The audience is none the wiser, though, and they even get some laughs when Anne has to manoeuvre her into the correct spot mid scene.

She manages to get some sleep in between shows, the low murmurs of the other talking to each other while passing the time lulling her to sleep. Jane pulls her head into her lap and is lazily playing with Katherine’s hair as she curls up into Jane’s warmth.

She’s woken up way too soon with the news that they have to get ready for show number two, and Catalina’s voice is gentle as she helps her sit up. Jane is no longer there, but there’s a blanket tucked around her.

“You look tired, mija, are you sure you’re up for this?”

“I can do it, I promise. I’ll make sure to go to bed early tonight,” Katherine smiles.

Catalina looks conflicted but after a moment moves to press a kiss to her forehead and helps her up from the couch, “Alright, come on then.”

Somehow she makes it through that one unscathed as well, and before she knows it she’s back in the dressing room wiping off her makeup. Though the nap had done her good, the bags under her eyes haven’t disappeared. She looks exhausted.

Anna wraps an arm around her as they leave the theater and keeps it there for the short walk to the nearest tube station. She doesn’t ask Katherine if something is going on. She seems to understand regardless and instead just pulls Katherine closer and lets her lean her head on her shoulder as they ride the tube home.

Once they arrive at their shared house, everyone disperses and starts with their respective nightly rituals. Katherine makes her way into the kitchen, rinsing out her mug from this morning and making herself another cup of tea.

The kitchen is empty and the house oddly quiet and she feels the exhaustion of the day catch up with her. She doesn’t have it in her to fight as her eyes droop closed, and then her tea is long forgotten as her head rests against the tabletop.

She doesn’t know how long she’s asleep before she’s woken up by Anne.

“Wakey wakey, Kitty-kat. I know you’re tired but I’ve got a surprise for you, and I promise you it’s worth it.”

Katherine mumbles something unintelligible and tries to push the woman away, but Anne just laughs.

“Come on, I’ll help you up the stairs.”

Katherine feels herself being lifted out of her chair, Anne’s arm securely wrapped around her torso and she’s powerless to resist as Anne leads her up the stairs and into her bedroom, talking in a low voice the whole while in an attempt to keep Kat awake.

When she looks up, her bedroom is dark, curtains drawn and her nightlight being the only source of light in the room. Then her eyes fall on a messy pile of blankets in the middle of the floor. Anne immediately lies down and wraps a light green blanket around herself.

“We figured you could use some extra cuddle time, so…” Anne points to the pile of pillows and blankets around her, “Jump in!”

For a second Katherine is too stunned to move. She looks up to meet Anne’s eyes and is met with nothing but love. No judgement, she’s not forced to explain anything. Just love and care.

“Don’t worry though, it won’t be just me. Two people can’t be considered a cuddle pile,” Anne laughs, “The others are just getting some snacks and other necessities.”

“Thank you, Annie.”

“Don’t mention it. We all need some extra love from time to time, right? Now, are you going to join me or am I supposed to cuddle myself?”

Without another word, Katherine makes herself comfortable amidst the blankets, burying her face in Anne’s side as the woman wraps her arm around Katherine’s middle.

Soon Anna and Cathy make their appearances, a tray with steaming mugs and a box of chocolates in hand. Lina joins them soon after, laptop open and ready for them to use. Jane comes in last, a few of Kat’s many teddy bears in her arms. She hands Kat her favourite one, a small red horse stuffy before settling down.

They all get comfortable on the floor, Jane lying down on Katherine’s other side, pulling her against her in a hug. Lina is seated close to her head, mug of hot chocolate in one hand and the other carefully detangling Katherine’s hair. She can’t help but let out a content sigh.

Cathy and Anna make up the ends, both still upright and sipping their drinks as they all talk among themselves. The sound of Jane whispering soft words into the back of her neck soothes her, and Anne’s arm doesn’t move from it’s protective hold on her younger cousin.

They decide on a Disney movie, The Aristocats, Cathy’s favourite. (Anna’s too, but if you ask her she’ll deny it.) It plays low to the background, and it doesn’t take long for Katherine’s eyes to slip closed, exhaustion now fully taking hold of her. She’s warm and feels safe in the arms of the other queens. With them all looking out for her, the nightmares stay away that night and Kat sleeps better than she has in weeks.

The usual chill and restlessness in her bones is absent as she wakes up the next morning, still sandwiched between Anne and Jane. The other queens are all passed out around her, Cathy curled up in Lina’s arms drooling softly on her own outstretched arm. Even Anna is still there, slumped in a half sitting position with her back against the wall, neck at an uncomfortable looking angle.

Seeing them all still there fills Katherine with a kind of warmth she can’t really describe. She feels calm and loved.

So loved.

So, she tucks her head back beneath her cousin's chin and closes her eyes, the world could wait for a few more minutes.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr [here](https://northernstarswriting.tumblr.com/)


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